So what else happened in St. Louis?

This week has just been miserable.  I don't know why, but lately, I feel like I've wanted to change everything about who I've become.  I just haven't liked myself very much lately; whether it be because I hate the way my hair falls, or the way my dress just seems too short because I'm just too damn tall, or how I get so angry at work, that I swear.  A lot.  

I just hate it.  I feel like I'm back in high school; all depressed and hating on myself.  Like when I'd lock myself in my room and blast The Cranberries.  It only gets accentuated when I'm here by myself, and B is on business.  I try to bring myself up, whether it be with a bubble bath, or a glass of wine, or a new nail polish, but sometimes, there is just no getting out of it.  

So I'll write.  Whether it be here or in a journal, and I'll pore through my old picture albums, trying to think of happier times.  Sometimes it helps; sometimes it doesn't.  

So I'll share pictures from my happy St. Louis trip in hopes it'll up my spirits before I go to sleep.

from the museum inside the Arch...or below it I guess.

Morgan Street Brewery; this place was overwhelmed with Packers fans. 

Chicago dog in the Chicago airport.

Packer pumpkin head.

Where we had lunch...It was delicious.  Remember watching the AU game and being semi-embarrassed and surrounded by Wisconsin fans.  And ordering an entire burger made out of gigantic mushrooms.  Not on purpose.

The outside of Morgan Street brewery.

Shot board!  Carla and I had the Skittles shot, and it was amazing.  It really tasted like skittles!

I Don't know if I'd call it the best....

Photobombing.  

Maybe I'll come out of it.   I wish there was some way to just tell myself to snap out of it; that things aren't that bad, and I'll get through this, but for some reason, there just isn't.  The more I think about now, the more I think about all of my mistakes in the past.  And I know that it isn't fair to blame myself for my past, but I have done some things that I am not proud of, and it all just wraps itself into me wanting to change.