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All Mixed UP

8.11.09

So, it's been awhile in the blogger world. There really has been too too much going on. But I was sitting here at work on a Sunday (damn you rental football), and was reading through my old ones, and realized that that is my only connection to the past is through these things. Since everyone knows the story about what happened to my other things, and I won't go on my rant about that, this and xanga are all I have. I had one before all of this, but it was super graphic and full of swear words and I was embarassed by it, so I deleted it. I wish I wouldn't have now.

I was reading all these other blogs by people that actually have something to say or to show pictures of their children, and then wondered why I even blog. I don't have pictures of babies to show grandparents; I don't really ever have anything important to say, and I'm sure if I did there would be a limited amount of people who would ever really read it.

Let's just face it: I am not an important person. At. All. At work, I don't feel very important, even though I am a manager now. Don't really feel like it; still get left out of almost everything. I guess bennett can make me feel like an important person, but I'm his wife now, and it's just more routine to have me around than something special. I guess the last big milestone in my life now is to have a kid. Probably wouldn't count on it anytime soon anyway.

Last night we went out with some friends to Oasis and there was a really great band playing!! It was the first time in a while we'd actually gone out out and had a few. The friends that we were with, well it's sort of complicated. Back before Bennett and I started dating, there was a coworker of his that he wanted to set me up with. So we went out on a few dates, and then there was the realization that Bennett and I had feelings for each other, and me and other guy broke it off. Well other guy had his version of me in another girl. So I had met other girl (they had been friends forever and was super obvious, even then, that they were meant to be together), and obviously she didn't like me very much. Thought she was a snob, blah blah. So now these two are dating, and I guess have been for over a year. But it turns out, she is not a snob and she's actually pretty awesome. And it was never awkward with other guy, so at least I guess that could mean everyone, including me, is getting older.

I feel like these things used to be filled with weekends of debauchery and boys. And now I'm all married going to see jam bands with other couples. Wow.